AND I NEVER WILL.
You see, I'm a recovered chocoholic. I used to be addicted. If I was hungry, I'd have me a bite. If I was bored, I'd have me a couple bites. If I was depressed or feeling some otherwise negative emotion, I'd probably have a half a bag. Let's be honest, I would steal for chocolate. And I have.
Anyway, I decided-this is stupid. Isn't it a bit ridiculous-I mean, really-a SLAVE for chocolate? Really?! What happened to self-control? What happened to dignity?....What happened to my waist?????!
I even thought, Lisa...your not THAT overweight. If you cut chocolate out of your diet you would probably stop gaining 10 or so lbs every year. I bet that's from chocolate.
But none of this was ever enough.....until one day.....Andrew and I were in the car, driving.....
It's January, 5 weeks ago, and Andrew and I are on our way home from a (insert every imaginable awesome, happy word here) Christmas/wedding/Hawaii vacay. We stop at a gas station for some food. Andrew was getting a burger from Burger King. I wasn't hungry enough for a full burger, but I just wanted the taste of something a littttttttle sweet. You know how that goes, dontchya;p So I walk around the gas station store, checkin out the goods. THERE!!! Found it. That's the perfect one. I delicately grab my treasured bag of chocolate-covered almonds, and merrily throw down the 7 or 8 bucks for them. "It's okay," the little voice inside my head says, "you deserve it." I sure as heck didn't care about its affects on me before and I sure as heck don't care now. It's chocolate. Big deal, right?
Andrew and I get on the road again, his burger mostly munched on and me eating my delectable almonds. We're talking, chatting up about life or something. I think we might have been talking about where we wanted our lives to go or something. Anywho, the point is, we were talking and mid-sentence, I said, "This is stupid, Andrew. I'm addicted to these things. I'm gonna quit right now." And after a small pause of thought, I rolled down my window and chucked the bag right out as we flew down the interstate. Andrew laughed, and I thought about the 7 bucks, but it felt GOOOOD. I didn't care. I was free. I no longer had to be addicted to chocolate and I no longer am. It's incredible. For anyone who knows me, that really is a feat. I mean I was known as the girl not to give chocolate to in elementary school-I would get incredibly hyper. So for me to quit cold turkey? Nah. But it's true. I've done it. I'm done. But how. And why.
I did it because it was controlling me and I don't like that feeling. I felt like it was silly for any kind of food to have that much power over me. I'm the one in control of my body afterall (aside from God, but you get my point.) So I quit. And I did it with His help. In the short pause before chucking the chocolate out the window, I imagined in my mind's eye my addictive tie to chocolate and then I imagined giving it to Jesus Christ. My Savior and Healer. I gave it to him cuz I wasn't doing so well with it.
And He has followed through amazingly. I believe because my motive is what it is, and because I was committed to it and have faith in it, that God has continually supported me in the rest. Funny as it is, I feel like it has gone a long way to help improve my faith in Jesus Christ. I still exercise self-control. But it's different now. I still allow myself to have chocolate every once in a while, if I want to, but it has all pretty much gone away-the desire. On average, I probably have the equivalent of one cookie every week or so. That is a SIGNIFICANT change from before. A lot of times I don't even finish the piece of sugar or chocolate I started eating (I also have stopped eating sugary food in general because I found it weakened my resolve). I don't feel deprived or anything. I no longer have an affinity or bond with chocolate. I am free.
Long story short, I believe Christ has the ability to help us with our wounds. I believe He can help in big and little things. I believe He lives to free me from debts, sin, and weaknesses. Thank you to a marvelous Heavenly Father who has provided me a plan. What can He do for you?